Prologue

Do you know why the legions of the damned possess the living? Air conditioning. It's true. Even I have been known to do it from time to time. And you may ask, "Well Lucifer, why don't you and your many minions possess people in places like Antarctica or Alaska, where it's cold all the time?"

The reason why is because it is just too fucking cold in those places.

I'll let you in on a another little secret. Kind of a glimpse of Hell. Parts of Hell are very cold. Like icicles-forming-on-your-nose cold.

Hell is a place of extremes. It is where what He Who Rules puts those who don't accept him and his messengers's words. He Who Rules doesn't like it when you choose the other way, or guy even.

I hear some whiney little bitch from Midwest America asking, "Gee, Lucifer, what about free will?"

Let me tell you about Free Will, my little sister-lusting, tax cheating, mouth breather-hater of all things different and un-American: The game is rigged.

Still don't get it?

Have you ever been to Vegas, or Sin City as they call it? Do you know why casinos never go bankrupt? It's because the fix is in. The house always wins, but everyone is given the promise of a chance to win big. Nobody does. And it is the same with Free Will. You can choose one way or the other, but if you choose the other, you're fucked. Where is the freedom in that? For a Supreme Being who is the end all-be all of all that is good and just, that is not fair, not fair at all.

You cannot call something Free Will and have the consequences of those choices be judged inferior just because they don't agree with your point of view. That is cheating. That is criminal. And the Almighty (Creator, He Who Rules, etc.) is the most extreme gangster of all Creation, with his hands in mass murder, politics, and oppression and torture.

Extremes. He Who Rules is an extremists. That's why mainly extremists worship him. That's why those who blow up anything in the name of whatever name they give Him get into the party upstairs where it's always a comfortable 75 degrees Fahrenheit.

Man, I hate Vegas. It's so much like Heaven, you don't even know...